Title: Lost and Found

Chapter: 32

~~~~~~~~~~

Moving in hadn’t taken long since none of them had much in the way of stuff. Gwen had simply dumped her two bags in Sam’s room and helped Jo arrange the bedroom she and Dean had chosen. After a quick lunch, they’d all sat down at the table and, with Ellen and Bobby’s help, had developed a clear, realistic picture of their finances and what it would take to run their base. Eventually, they’d need to sit down and assess again, but not for awhile. The money Jo and Dean had won helped, as did what had been left in Jo’s college fund.

Gwen felt more like an adult that she ever had. It was a good feeling to be in charge of her own life.

Some day soon, they were going to have to change their arrangement and work it more like Bobby did, with at least one of them having an actual job to pay bills. She’d jokingly suggested they go into business as private investigators, to which Sam and Jo had seemed thoughtful. Jo had begun looking into that even. Dean’s suggestion was that Sam write a wildly successful series of paranormal romances like what were hot on the market. He’d been full of plot ideas, too. Gwen hadn’t asked how he knew what was hot on the market. She’d come to the conclusion that Dean was definitely a romantic beneath everything. After all, the guy had a secret addiction to ‘Dr. Sexy, M.D.’ and thought only Sam knew about it. In actuality, everyone knew about it. Sam, Jo, Gwen, Ellen, Bobby. Probably Castiel, too.

While Gwen had chosen the smallest bedroom upstairs, she really shouldn’t have bothered since she was in Sam’s room every night since they’d moved in anyway. He’d chosen the back lower room for his bedroom and it was just right for a full sized bed, a nightstand, small dresser, and a table and chair in one corner. Her clothes and his mingled in the dresser drawers and the closet. They hadn’t even talked about doing it. Sam had just unpacked everything one morning while she’d been at Bobby’s.

Her efforts to dig up information on her birth parents were frustrating in that there was no information. All she had was the birth certificate and the mentions in the journals. It was maddening to be so close and far away at the same time. They all told her to be patient and Jo insisted that if the information was out there, Sam would find it. ‘Sam,’ she’d said, ‘can find anyone whether they want to be found or not.’ There was probably a story behind that, considering the tone Jo had used, but Gwen didn’t ask. There were still a lot of things she didn’t know about all of them. One of these days, she’d ask all of the questions she was building up, but not yet. It could all come later.

She was contemplating going to see Arlene about her birth parents. Sam may be good, but Gwen knew Arlene had skills few did in that area. Arlene had been the one Gwen had always used to find people before. She’d go, make the trip solo, and see what Arlene could find for her. She’d even fly out to the coast so she wouldn’t be gone as long as if she drove. Gwen hadn’t shared her plan with anyone yet. She wanted to make sure Sam had had a chance to dig before she went to someone else.

“We’ll figure it out,” Sam told her in an eerie bout of mind reading, hand sliding along her bare arm in a slow caress. “Even if I have to trick Cas and trap him in Holy Fire to get him to talk.”

“Aww….” Gwen moved closer under the covers, running a hand along his bare chest. “You’d piss off an angel for me? Sam, that’s sweet.”

“We’ll track down your birth parents or at least find out about your family, where you’re from, what they do. Maybe you even have living relatives. It just might take awhile is all.”

“Ellen thinks I came from hunters.”

“Ellen could be right.” He rolled onto his back “Even aliases leave trails of some kind and there isn’t one. That makes me think someone did their best to cover up who Mia and Aaron were and erase them.”

“The Campbell’s?”

“Maybe. Depending on where the trail leads, it might not be a human agency that did it.”

“What, like a demon?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of an angel and a recent cover-up. Cas didn’t want us digging.”

“You don’t think that he --”

“If he thought he was protecting you and us, he might bury the information, make it go away.” He put an arm beneath his head. “I wish those boxes were in some sort of real order. Finding those years Patricia listed hasn’t been as easy as I’d thought.” He had that look in his eyes, the one that indicated his mind had been working overtime on this puzzle.

He wasn’t the only one. They’d both been trying to find the file for the case Neal and Patricia had been working on when Neal had taken Gwen home to his family to raise, the one that Gwen was connected to in some way. It didn’t appear to be there, nor was there any sign as yet of Neal’s hunting diaries. He’d written as much as her mother had, so there should be volumes of information.

“At least we found my childhood. I knew dad took a butt-load of pictures.” It had been nice to go through them with her newest family around her, explaining who people were and in the case of a couple pictures, what had been going on. She looked at the clock, then sat up with a tiny smile. “Happy birthday, Sam. It’s officially May second. You’re thirty. How’s it feel to be old?”

“I’ll ask Dean in the morning.”

She laughed. “Good answer. What time are you leaving tomorrow?” They’d caught a case that looked to be large on heavy lifting of the sort Gwen had always passed on. She knew her physical limits.

“When we convince Jo she doesn’t need to go with us. You know, I don’t get it. She knows she’s pregnant, knows she has to make concessions for that, yet she’s acting like it’s another ordinary day in our lives.”

“Dean’s not helping. Admit that. He’s behaving like she’s a civilian who needs to be protected. I’m trying to stay out of the crossfire.”

“Good plan.”

Shifting, she straddled him, the covers pooling about them. “So. You never told me what you wanted for your birthday.”

His hands grasped her hips. “I think you’ve got a good start on a present.”

“Why Sam, are you being vulgar,” she asked in a playful voice.

“Why yes, Gwen, yes I am.”

Leaning down, she placed a whisper soft kiss on his lips. “I can work with that.”

~~~~~~~~~~

The argument had been going on for nearly an hour. Dean insisted Jo had to stay home while Jo wanted to go with them.

“No. You’re staying here.”

“Dean!”

“It’s too dangerous. You stay here or we bump it to someone else.”

“I’m going.”

Dean looked down at her stomach. Jo knew he was focusing on her stomach. He always focused on it anymore and as soon as she’d started to show, he’d promptly forgotten she was a hunter too -- and she wasn’t even ready for maternity clothes yet. The baby was still a little bump and she had no trouble fastening her jeans, but Dean was behaving like her belly was out front and center where no one could possibly miss that she was pregnant. He’d taken to putting his hand on her stomach at night and sliding it slowly over the bump.

She knew that much more of this protective crap and she’d strangle him -- and there were still months to go.

“You most certainly are not. Sam’ll stay here with you.”

“Wait, what?” Sam paused in choosing weapons to pack, head swiveling in their direction. “I’ll what? No, Dean --”

“Yes. You stay here and protect Jo.”

“Protect --” Jo groaned in frustration and stomped a foot. “Dean, we live here! I don’t need a bodyguard.”

“You’re pregnant. You need someone with you in case something happens.”

“I have a phone. Mom, Jodie, and Bobby are like five, ten, and fifteen minutes away respectively and it’s not an issue because I’m going with you.”

Gwen cleared her throat. “I’ll stay.”

Jo rounded on her. “Gwen!”

“It’s a muscle job, Jo. We’d pass on it anyway. Besides,” she held up her phone, “Bobby has something for us and it’s local.”

“What is it,” Dean demanded.

Gwen’s smile was crooked. “Don’t get your boxers in a twist, Dean. I think it has to do with the boxes.”

Or maybe something to do with tracing Gwen’s parents? None of them had any luck with the names. Mia and Aaron Carys appeared to be aliases, though Ellen had suggested that perhaps someone had done a good job of erasing obvious traces of them. That theory was no stranger than some of the others they’d been coming up with. They’d even made a game of creating odd theories until it had become obvious that Gwen was starting to get depressed with the lack of progress. Jo had a feeling that one of these days, they’d find something and the whole puzzle would come together in one fell swoop.

“I want to go with you and Sam,” she insisted, then realized how bratty and childish that sounded and continued like she’d meant to all along, “but I guess I’ll stay here and see what Bobby has for us.” She held up a finger at Dean, pointing at him. “You did not win.”

He was hiding a pleased smile, his eyes dancing with smug satisfaction. “I fully understand that.”

“I’m choosing to stay because Bobby comes up with some interesting cases. Whatever he has for us will be…interesting.”

“He does find the interesting ones,” Dean agreed. “Now, we’ll be gone for a couple weeks at least depending on how it goes. We’ll try to get back faster.”

“Text me as often as you can.” Stepping close, Jo grasped the edges of his shirtfront and looked up at him. He put his hands on her waist. “Do what you have to, Dean, okay?”

From the corner of her eye, she saw Sam zip the bag of weapons, heft it, and grasp Gwen’s hand in his, leading her outside.

“You understand me? Don’t you pull back because you’ve got me and junior on your mind. You give this case no less than your usual percent or I will kick your ass when you return.”

“Whatever I have to,” he said with a nod.

“Good.” She raised a hand, pressed it to his cheek. “I love you.”

“I love you, too, Jo.”

“Go kick some monster ass.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

She watched him drive off with Sam, her feelings mixed. It was the first job they’d taken since getting the base set up and she’d wanted to be a part of that. It was historic in a way. The beginning of a new era.

Gwen leaned on the porch railing as the dust faded in the breeze. “Want to go out now or wait until later?”

“Let me call mom first, see if she has any idea what Bobby’s got.”

Ellen didn’t answer though, and Jo and Gwen headed for Bobby’s house.

~~~~~~~~~~

A single glance was all it took for Bobby to reflect on how young all of them were. Dean, Jo, Sam, and Gwen. They were babies really. Stubborn babies, but babies all the same. Jo was just like her mama, not willing to bend when she thought she was right, and Dean? He was like John, yet not in the way Dean assumed. He’d gotten the stubborn gene John had been full of.

“What’s this?” Jo gestured at the accordion file folder Bobby plopped in front of her.

“A compromise for you to take to your husband.” When Jo merely stared at it, Bobby sighed and rolled his eyes. “Will you just open it?”

Two stubborn peas in a pod those two were. Dean was acting like being pregnant removed every one of Jo’s hunting skills and Jo was behaving like nothing was different. Both needed to change fast. While Bobby understood Dean’s protectiveness of Jo, she was already chafing under his restrictions and was beginning to feel like he thought she was a civilian idiot instead of an experienced hunter who just happened to have a bun in the oven. On the flip side, he understood her view, too. It had to be maddening to find herself back at something like square one where Ellen had kept her for years.

With a put upon sigh, she opened it and drew out the top papers. In ten seconds, he had her interest. Her expression smoothed out, the attitude dropping away. “Tell me,” she demanded.

“We’ve been cataloguing the contents of those boxes.”

“Uh-huh….” She held up a page of line drawings.

“That file you have in your hands is a listing of cursed objects they ran across and failed to retrieve and put in safe places. Some of those were boxed, but nabbed by a thief named Bela Talbot a few years back. There are notations to the side of the drawings and pictures in that case. Looks like she’d found one of the storage units and broke in. As for the rest? Out there somewhere causing mayhem.”

“And?”

“You put together a nice file.”

“I’m good at field work, too,” she replied sweetly.

“Field work is out if you want a calm relationship with Dean at present.”

Her lips pursed with displeasure.

He continued. “Start tracking them down. When you think you’ve got one, pass it to Gwen or Sam and Dean or other hunters. Give them all to Sam and Dean if you want. I figure there’s enough there to occupy you for a good year or longer depending on how hidden they are by now.”

“Dean won’t like it.”

Dean wanted to keep Jo out of the line of fire, but he was going at it all wrong. “He’ll like it less if you’re running around out there in the field. It’s called a compromise. Neither of you gets exactly what you want and you’re equally disappointed.”

She glanced up at him. “It’ll keep me in the game, though.”

“And relatively safe -- as much as any of us ever are. While you’re here, you can answer phones, too.”

“You want me on the phones? Hormonal me?”

He wouldn’t actually put her on the phones, but at least she realized she was hormonal now. “Depends on who it is. Garth could use a verbal slap sometimes.”

“Garth always thinks I’m coming on to him.”

“He thinks anything female is coming on to him.”

“True, because he’s such a ‘play-ah’.”

Bobby smiled. “Take it to Dean when he gets back.”

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. Hate seeing you mope around.”

She slid the papers back in the folder. “Hey, do you know where mom is? I’ve tried her cell and we drove by the house, but she’s not there.”

That was odd. Ellen was always accessible these days. “Nope. Maybe you could talk to Jodie later? She might know something.”

“Maybe.”

He adjusted his cap. “Well, I got work.” Ten minutes later, while he was working on the engine of a new acquisition, Gwen came to watch. She didn’t say anything, simply watched and he cleared his throat. “Good call on that file you found.”

“Thank you.”

“Something you want?”

She shrugged slowly. “Not really.” Her tone suggested otherwise.

Bobby waited.

Gwen leaned against the car. “You’ve known a lot of hunters over the years, right?”

“I have, but I didn’t get into hunting until….”

“I know. Sam told me. Still, you know people and you’ve known people. What do you think of what we’ve found so far about my birth parents? Ellen thinks they were hunters and it was more an honor thing, the Campbell’s taking me in as an orphan.”

“It’s possible, I guess. I don’t know, Gwen. The only thing we know is that Neal and Patricia Campbell knew your parents and that Aaron and Mia had done research for them on a few cases. They could have been civilian sources who got caught in the crossfire.”

“Or hunters taking time off from being active to start a family.”

“Could be. Got no answers for you. Wish I did.”

“Anyone you could ask?”

He sighed and stood up straight, wiping his hands on a cloth. “I suppose I could ask Rufus and a few others if they’ve heard the names, but, to tell you the truth, there’s not too many older hunters left to ask. The Apocalypse got a lot of good men and women, Gwen, and the ones who really might have been able to give you answers were among them.”

“Would you try?”

He studied her. It had taken him awhile to warm up to her, but he was glad she’d become part of their family. She made Sam smile and that was a task all in itself these days. “I’ll see what I can find.”

Gwen nodded. “Thank you, Bobby.” She gestured at the engine. “Anything I can do to help?”

“Yeah, you can go in and make sure Jo doesn’t go stir-crazy.”

With a nod and a smile, she was gone, back towards the house. He waited a few minutes, then drew out his phone and began to call around.

~~~~~~~~~~

Castiel had expected Balthazar to be difficult to find. He’d expected to have to literally track him down.

That wasn’t the case.

Upon entering the throne room with Jael and Abby, he found Balthazar waiting there, lounging in one chair below the dais. He had a leg thrown over the arm and was swinging that foot back and forth. His hands were laced across his stomach.

“There you are, Cassy. I thought I’d have to come looking for you.”

“What have you done with Uzziel,” Jael demanded, rushing forward towards him.

“I don’t answer to you,” was his calm reply. “I answer to Cas only.”

“Then answer,” Castiel told him. “What have you done to Uzziel?”

“You’re aware of his weakness. How is his fight with that coming?”

“He chose heaven.”

Balthazar laughed. “Did he? Did he really?” He turned in the chair, sitting up. “Unless he can deal with his desire head-on, he’s useless to you. All I’ve done is give him the opportunity to properly contemplate his desire and face it for good.”

He was calm, too calm. He should be making excuses and running away, yet here he sat, calm in the throne room beneath Castiel’s gaze. “Where is he?”

“Safe and sound. Same as Ellen. They’re both rather safe at present.”

“Ellen?” Castiel felt alarm stab through him. “Balthazar what exactly have you done? I knew you disliked Uzziel, but to play with his eternity?”

Standing, he crossed his arms. “How long do you think before he’d slip; before the wondering would get too much for him and he’d go back down?”

“It’s not your call to make. You’ve no right to do that to him or anyone else. You’re causing trouble for no reason other than to cause trouble because you’re bored.”

He blinked and seemed taken aback by that charge. “I am bored, yes, but there is a reason. Cas, listen to me. Uzziel has to face his fear and longing or you will lose him to earth. It’s inevitable as long as he tried to deny it’s there. I don’t like him, I do believe I’d do a better job than he, but do you really think I believe you’ll promote me knowing I’d sent him on a trial by fire? I may have my sleazy moments, but I’m not stupid.” He turned his head, studying Abigael, then Jael. “Jael, you know Uzziel the best of all of us. If he doesn’t face this now, will he eventually fall?”

“You don’t know that.” The affirmative was on his face though. What Balthazar said was true and Jael knew it.

Why hadn’t Uzziel admitted that? Why had he tried to hide it?

“You can’t keep him insulated from his desires. He’s been wavering, Castiel. He claimed he wasn’t and he lied. We all saw it and anyone who claims otherwise is also lying. He’s facing it right now and he’ll either fall or come back stronger than ever. He’s had twenty days thus far and today marks the beginning of the final twenty. I must say he did very well in those first days. When the forty-first day begins, the locks holding him in place at present will dissolve into nothing. They’re made to be temporary. They’ll also dissolve if he makes a very clear decision that conquers his desires completely.”

“You’re pathological,” Castiel murmured, shaking his head.

Balthazar rolled his eyes and held out his hands. “Here. Either slap me on the wrists, confine me until he emerges safe from his trial, or let me go.”

He hated to confine anyone, but it had to be done. He couldn’t let Balthazar run free after this. “Jael, call a few guards.”

“Now all the others will know you mean business. Don’t be too lenient on me, Cassy. You’ll thank me later and if Uzziel doesn’t come through this, I’ll accept full banishment from heaven without fighting you over it.”

“Why are you so certain he won’t fall,” Abby asked, moving to stand beside Castiel. Her arm brushed his.

“Because he’s stronger than he thinks. Once he understands how to approach it, he can help the others with it, and there are others struggling at present.”

Balthazar was right. Uzziel wasn’t the only one. Castiel had seen others having the same desires.

Abby slid her hands in her coat pockets. “You’re reasoning is skewed, yet strangely logical on all points. Cause trouble and force Cas to deal with you as a warning to others not to do the same. Kidnap Uzziel and force him to face his weakness in the belief that he’s strong enough to overcome in the end. You’ve a strange way to show your loyalty.”

He winked. “It works, sweetheart.” His attention slid to Castiel. “You should sentence me publicly.”

“You’re not being noble or self-sacrificing --”

“No, I’m not,” he agreed. “I want you to succeed because I believe you’re the best one to run this joint. Uzziel will emerge from his prison all the better. You’ll see.” The guards arrived and he stepped towards them. “Ahh, my jailers. Shall we go then boys?”

“He’s maddening,” Castiel told Abby after Balthazar had been taken away. Jael had followed the guards, leaving Cas and Abby alone.

“That he is, but he’s sincere in his desire that you succeed.” She took the chair Balthazar had been sitting in, perching on the edge.

“He didn’t have to do any of that. Kidnapping Uzziel, then Ellen. Putting them somewhere….”

“Somewhere safe, as he stressed.”

Castiel paced before her. “What sort of place would he consider safe?”

“One guarded from us and from humans both, considering this human age of technology and GPS.”

“True, true.” He nodded. “What sort of location would be shielded from us? A place that Uzziel would be free of easily once however Balthazar has him jailed dissolves.”

“Well….” Standing, Abby came to him, arms crossing. “We could check the safe houses Zachariah had set up all over the world.”

“I checked those.”

“I mean the unofficial ones. His personal escapes.”

“Personal….” Why did that not surprise him? “I should have anticipated that.” Knowing how Zachariah had been, why hadn’t he realized Zachariah had kept unofficial places as well? He would have wanted a place to do the dirty work he’d engaged in, like raising Jo and Ellen from the dead and messing with their minds. He would have needed privacy to do that. “How did you know?”

“A guess. As sneaky as he was….” One shoulder lifted in a shrug. She hadn’t liked Zachariah any better than most of the remaining angels in heaven. “I could still be wrong.”

“Abby,” he stepped close to her. “Who will have that information or know where to find it?”

“Try Mariel. She worked directly for him for awhile until he decided she wasn’t driven in the way he wanted her to be. He had her demoted.”

“Thank you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

The curtains on the cabin windows were drawn and Ellen wondered what the landscape outside looked like. Where had this Balthazar dropped her?

“Where are we?”

Uzziel shrugged and leaned back on his hands. “I honestly don’t know. Balthazar and a few of his like-minded associates attacked me, dragged me out of heaven, and I lost consciousness. I’m not certain why. I woke up here and to his smug challenge to last forty days on earth.”

“Not very supportive is he?”

He laughed a little at that comment. “Supportive is the last word to describe what he is, but he is quite loyal to Castiel in his own way. If that matters.”

“It might.” She gripped the edge of the mattress and looked about the cabin again, taking time to really study it. Honestly, it looked like one of those places Dean and Sam usually stayed at except for the two rows of symbols on the walls, one high and the other low. A few Ellen recognized and she gestured to them. “Enochian, right?”

“Obscure Enochian at that. Where he dug those up I don’t know. They haven’t been used…. Well, not since Michael and Lucifer first began tangling. You see the ones on the left over there? They were part of the first layer of Lucifer’s prison.” He sighed. “The particular combination of symbols keeps me from seeing out and others from seeing me in here. Anyone intending to ride in and save us --”

“Save us? What about your angelic powers?”

“Nullified by the symbols on the lower half of the walls. They have a dampening effect, rendering me helpless. The only advantage left is my human vessel and I’m not seeing much advantage right now in that.”

“Uz…. What’s going on here,” Ellen asked cautiously.

Drawing his knees up, he wrapped his arms about them. “Jealousy I think? I’m not certain. There’s a firm belief among some that I’m unqualified for the position of trust and friendship that Castiel has extended to me and all because I was one of Raphael’s generals. I hadn’t thought it was the issue it apparently has become. You see, Balthazar and Castiel were friends once, but things happened. Cas no longer trusts him like he did and much of it is Balthazar’s own fault. Balthazar wants to be where I am. Was, rather. I wonder if he’s convinced them all that I fell? I was struggling with the human condition.”

“Why would you fall?”

His glance slid to her, bright and intense. “Do you have any idea how many human wars have started over a single woman?”

“You don’t mean….” She raised her brows, taking a moment to think abut that. “Me? I’m hardly Helen of Troy, Uz.”

“But you appeal to me on a physical and emotional level. I have contemplated falling many hours.” Uzziel rested his chin on his knees. “I’d been lying to Castiel about that. He spelled out my choices and I did try. I tried to concentrate on my work and ignore the allure of humanity. I didn’t want to disappoint him, so I lied about feeling better.” He closed his eyes a moment. “I lied, Ellen. How far I’ve already lowered myself…. I thought I might succeed in passing Balthazar’s challenge until he dropped you in here with me. He’s figured out my weakness and has the tactical advantage at present.”

“So turn that to your favor.” He was attracted to her on an emotional level? How was that possible with what Castiel had once told her about angels and emotions?

“How? He found my weakness. He’s used it against me.”

“Make your weakness a strength.”

“I don’t understand,” Uzziel admitted with a frown.

“Uzziel, think about Sam and Dean Winchester. In angelic eyes they’re weak, right? Stubborn, disobedient. Filled to the brim with weaknesses galore.”

He nodded. “Yes. We found everything about humans to be weak.”

“Those two stubborn, disobedient humans stopped the Apocalypse. They used what you all considered weakness to thwart the plan for them.”

“So how do I turn this to my favor? How do I make my longing to be on earth a strength?”

She didn’t want to tell him she hadn’t thought that part out yet. Instead, she asked, “Cas said angels don’t feel like we do, so why are you feeling emotions?”

“That actually used to be true. I think it’s a switch that’s gotten thrown inside of all of us. I never really felt like this until the civil war was over, though I know others felt it much earlier. The ones who fled heaven were the first after Castiel to break that restriction. When I decided to like humans and came to see you, the temptation to leave heaven then was high. I felt emotions I’d never experienced before.” He sighed. “There’s a purpose to it. There has to be. I just can’t see it from where I am. He has a purpose in what He allows to happen, even to His angels. I just…. I can’t see it, Ellen. I don’t like not being able to see the meaning behind this. Why would He allow this mass emotional opening in us? What is the purpose?”

“Can you control it?”

“No. I can’t control my feelings.” He features scrunched like he was fighting off tears. “Some of us can. Castiel obviously. He’s practically human in many ways now, yet retains a sense of what he is. Abigael, Jael, Ariel…. How do they do it? How do they keep that certainty of self?”

How many more were there in heaven like Uzziel, unable to stem the flood of emotion to remain on earth for any length of time? It reminded Ellen of a test in a way, weeding out those who couldn’t pass it and setting those who could apart for something else. “So what do we do for the next twenty days?”

“Our best to keep me from falling. Rebuff me, Ellen. Be cruel and strike me if need be.”

She smothered a smile. “Somehow I doubt that’ll be necessary.” Getting up, she studied the cabin with an eye towards escape. “Have you tried leaving?”

“I can’t touch the walls because of the symbols,” he explained.

Stepping to one wall, Ellen laid a hand on it. “Maybe not, but I can.” She looked thoughtfully about the cabin, a plan forming. “See if you can’t find me a few things to use as tools.”

“Ellen?”

“This might not work if Balthazar is familiar with all types of women.” In minutes, he’d found a few things she could use and Ellen set to work on the door first, watching him out of the corner of her eye. For all his claims that he was tempted by her, he wasn’t looking at her any differently than he had before. “Let me get this straight. You were a soldier?”

“Yes, a general.”

“Look at this from a tactical standpoint. Take a step back --”

He took a literal step backwards. “Done.”

“Approach it like this is a battle. You’re outnumbered, outgunned, and it looks like you’re going to lose. What do you do?” Before he could answer, she let out a growl of frustration and kicked the door. “What does this have, reinforced steel behind the lock?” Prying at the door did no good either. It wasn’t budging.

“I either retreat and regroup --”

“Which you can’t do.”

“Or I face the enemy head-on and put all of my resources against him.”

She went to one of the windows and shoved the curtain aside, intending on breaking the glass, only there was no window. There had likely been one at one time, but now it was rough wall like the rest of the cabin. “Put that plan here. What should you do?”

“The enemy is Balthazar --”

“Wrong. The enemy is your desire for humanity. You’ve got to face it, sweetie.” Ellen turned to look at him.

Understanding flickered in his eyes and he came towards her. “You’re right. I have to face my desire.” His hands cupped her face and Ellen had a second to realize his intent before his lips were on hers.

His kiss was everything Ellen remembered it being -- enticing, warm, enthusiastic. She forced herself to draw back from him. He followed, hands skimming her ribcage and curving around to her back, holding her close. Uzziel nibbled a line along her jaw and neck.

Ellen splayed her fingers along his chest on the crisp white dress shirt he wore and shoved. “Stop.” Her voice was hoarse, her hands on his chest trembling.

Her push didn’t move him at all.

“Why?” Confusion crossed his face in a ripple of emotion.

“Your vessel.”

“He had no wife or lover when he accepted me.” He bent to her and she turned her head, evading a second kiss.

“I mean, it’s his body, Uz, not yours. To do anything is a violation of him.”

“You mean I need his consent.” His expression went blank and before she could reply, he was smiling, gaze becoming clear and focused once more. “He’d like to get to know you, too. He’s enthusiastic about the prospect.”

“Not surprising since he’s been celibate for a couple years.”

One hand slid lower, pressing her hips closer. “I have permission.”

“From him, yes. Not from me.”

“Oh.” That hand stilled, slowly slid back up. “You…you don’t like me?”

He looked hurt by that and Ellen groaned inwardly. How did she get into these situations? “No, I like you, Uz. I like you very much, but I don’t want to be responsible for causing a holy being to fall from grace. You’re an angel, Uzziel.”

“I could be a man.”

“At what cost to you and your vessel?”

All playfulness bled from his eyes and he released her, stepping slowly away. “Castiel says that pain would be excruciating and eternal.”

“I’d trust him. It’s only by God’s favor that he was restored. If you walked away willingly, would you have that?”

“No.” He stared at the floor a moment, then looked back up at her with a hopeful gleam in his eyes. “What if we just…dally?”

“With your exuberant all or nothing personality? I don’t think you’re capable of dallying a few times and leaving. I think you’d have to be in with your entire self and that would mean falling.”

“But I want you, Ellen.”

“You can’t have me that way. We can be friends, Uz, but I won’t let you fall over me.”

“You’d still extend the hand of friendship to me?”

“Yes. What are you, Uzziel?”

“An angel.”

Ellen shook her head. He needed to understand it the way Castiel did. The way Cas said it was an emphasis on all that was holy, righteous, and pure about them. “No, Uzziel, think about it. Don’t take it for granted. You’re an angel of…?”

“The Lord.”

“What does that mean? How does that define you?” She leaned against the table. “You’re an angel of the Lord, a holy, righteous being. You’re so much more than I will ever be. You’re powerful and while you may not have a few human traits, you have the fellowship with other angels. You get to live in heaven. Why would you want to choose to be human? We’re fleeting.”

“God loves humans best.”

“From what I understand, he loves all of his creatures, angels included. You’re loved, Uzziel. What is your created purpose?”

“To serve Him.”

“Would falling to be with me serve God?”

“No, it would be….. It would be serving myself and my own desires.” He blinked several times, then stepped back. “Forgive me, Ellen, I’ve been impertinent and forward towards you. My apologies. My conduct recently has not been the reflection of holiness that it should be. Will you forgive me?”

“Of course.”

“I’m an angel of the Lord. My conduct must reflect that.”

The symbols on the walls flared bright white and then were gone. Ellen blinked several times in an attempt to see properly again. A hand touched her shoulder briefly and the glare from the light was gone.

Castiel was beside her. “You’re both well?” His tone was cautious, gaze curious.

“You found us.” She almost sagged in relief at not being trapped for more than a short while.

“Abby had an idea. I pursued it.”

“I understand how you do it now,” Uzziel said. “We’re holy beings. We were created to serve God’s purpose and when we forget that, it’s easy to forget everything else. You keep that in your mind, don’t you? You live to serve His purpose, whatever that may be.”

Cas nodded. “I did try to tell you.”

“You did.” He drew himself up tall. “I’m ready to return to work, if you believe me ready.”

“Go. I’ll take Ellen home.”

She was home in seconds, Castiel looking about her little house with a curious gaze.

“How did you convince him not to fall,” he asked in an almost nonchalant tone.

“I just had him think through what he was. Wasn’t even sure it would work.”

“Interesting.”

He was gone then and Ellen tried to figure out just how long she’d been gone.

~~~~~~~~~~

The search for Gwen hadn’t gone well. Samuel found himself missing Arlene’s talents in finding people. Gwen was likely using an alias. She wasn’t stupid. She knew how to go off the grid.

The other woman, however, was easy to find. Her parents hadn’t been hunters and Samuel wondered how Neal and Patricia could have been so sloppy as to let them try to hide themselves. The 1977 sacrifice was laughably easy to track, despite having moved several times and to different states. Once he was certain where she was, he tracked down Mia Carys.

Mia was nearly as difficult to find as Gwen. He’d had to search for evidence of her followers and use everything in Neal’s journal to engineer a meeting. Arlene had given him a good start on that before she’d hijacked the files and run off. Sometimes he wondered just how much Arlene knew. How much had she read before stealing his boxes of files?

The woman had agreed to a face-to-face meeting. She was much older than when that picture of her had been taken, but the resemblance to Gwen was just as eerie. This was what Gwen would eventually look like. He wondered why this witch allowed herself to age when she had the powers to stall that.

Samuel held out the information he’d been holding on to in preparation for this day. “I can’t give you Gwen. Her whereabouts are unknown to me, but I can give you an alternative.” He waved the file. “Take it. Open it.”

Slowly, she took it, glanced at the contents.

“The 1977 sacrifice that got away from you.”

Mia stared at him with cool eyes. “How do you know that?”

“Because it was my family who took the kid back.”

A flicker of annoyance in her eyes. “You’re a Campbell then. Samuel Campbell.” She said his name as thought tasting it. “Brave of you to come to me, hunter, after all the trouble your family has caused me and my own. So many decades we’ve tangled.” She handed the file to the woman behind her. “You’ve been watching her?”

“No. Her location just sort of…fell into my lap.”

“What do you want?”

“The first prize he’ll grant once topside.”

“Why should we give that to you?”

He smiled thinly. “Because without her or Gwen, you have to wait another cycle to attempt to raise him. Haven’t you waited long enough?”

“What makes you think I can’t get a sacrifice ready? I’ve managed the last three. One more --”

“You’re down to a group of four women. Makes searching several states more difficult. Four is a far cry from the many followers you had back in the seventies and eighties and even the nineties.”

Her head inclined in acknowledgement of that fact. “Perceptive. I lost quite a few of my people to Lucifer’s followers. His demons. He was persuasive and they were impatient.” She crossed her arms, looking him up and down. He was reminded of how Gwen looked at a person she didn’t trust. Gauging. “One condition.”

“What?”

“I want the location of the woman you used to find me. It’s a loose end. I can’t have that. You understand, yes?”

“Woman?”

She smiled and he felt a thin trickle of sweat snake down his spine. “Don’t deny it. I let you find me, Campbell. Your initial inquiries were hardly subtle. I saw her. I let her close enough to give you what you needed to find me. Who is she and where is she?”

“Her name is Arlene.”

Mia took the folder back from the woman with her and held it out to him. “Jot it all on that folder.”

He hesitated. Arlene was family. She’d been Christian’s wife. He’d had dinner at her table, slept in her house. After a moment’s consideration, he decided that Arlene was no more family than Gwen was. Arlene had married in and she’d betrayed him by taking the files. Samuel wrote what he knew of her whereabouts and ignored the fact that he’d once more crossed over a moral line. What was one more line, after all?

~~~~~~~~~~

Mia Carys watched Samuel Campbell leave. She tapped a finger on the file with the woman’s name. She turned her head, glance flicking to her helper. “Find the woman and deal with her.” The rest of them would follow Samuel, decide the sort of threat he was and eliminate him and any others with him.

“Let’s see how pathetic he thinks we are when three of four women are working him over,” she murmured to herself.

She’d waited this long, she wasn’t about to share her prize with a Campbell.