Title: Into The Woods
Chapter 9

~~~~~~~~~~

Castiel was in the middle of arguing with Abigael about training methods for Guardians when he felt it, like a warm breeze in the air.

Magic.

It wasn’t human magic, however. Human magic didn’t smell of wilderness and animal. He felt the tingle of it against his skin, felt it slide over him, attempting to get a foothold before it slipped from him and tumbled into the woods towards the Winchester camp.

“Get the children out,” he ordered her. “Now!”

She was already moving and by the time he, and the others reached the camp, she was gone, along with Jack and Sean. Sam, Dean, Jo, and Gwen were sprawled on the ground and in their chairs, unconscious. Castiel bit back a curse when he realized why Abigael hadn’t taken Jo with her. The magic had beaten Abigael to the camp. The child inside Jo wasn’t in danger, but there was something off about all of the Winchesters that he couldn’t put his finger on until Atropos spoke.

Atropos crouched down and placed a hand first on Sam’s shoulder, then Gwen’s. “Their souls are in the wrong bodies,” she said and he wondered how she could tell without them being awake to show mannerisms. Atropos looked up at him. “These two are switched. Those two are switched.” She stood. “Trust me, Castiel. I know what I’m talking about.”

“How?”

“I have insight you don’t into each person, remember? The threads of their lives?”

He moved to each of the Winchesters, making sure they were all in deep slumber. Hopefully, he could take care of this before they all woke and realized the sort of predicament they were in. “Balthazar, you and Atropos watch over the camp until Abigael returns.”

While Balthazar made a salute with his right hand, Uzziel shook his head. “No. Jael and Atropos will stay. We may need Balthazar’s experience when we find the source of the magic. Jael will be of better use here.”

Jael made no argument, merely taking up a place opposite Atropos in the camp.

Castiel, Balthazar, and Uzziel set out. The trail of magic was clear, much clearer than that vague scent they’d all noticed earlier. This trail led them to a clearing to the west, almost as if whoever it was wanted to be found. They emerged into it prepared to fight and found a short, squat creature waiting for them. Two small horns grew from his forehead and he appeared human to his legs, where a set of animal legs replaced human legs. He was lounging on the ground, a cushion beneath his head, empty food boxes and bags littering the ground. Beside him were three empty bottles of Dean’s favorite brand of beer.

In the clearing were also four beautiful, ethereal female creatures in filmy dresses. While they seemed human, they weren’t. Castiel could see the difference at a glance. Their features were too perfect to be human. One sat at the head of the male creature, running her fingers through his hair. The females giggled. The clearing smelled of wilderness and animal, an overpowering odor.

The male creature sat up with a delighted grin. “Welcome! I love guests! Chocolate bar, new friends?” He held out a container that read ‘chocolate for s’mores’ on a label in Jo’s handwriting and shook it. Castiel could see several chocolate bars still wrapped in the container. Here, apparently, was where their food had been going. The creature belched. “Excuse me.” He waved a hand. “Ladies, sing and dance for our guests.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Castiel told him.

“Of course it is. I’d be remiss as a host if I didn’t provide entertainment for my guests.” He got to his hooves and trotted to them. “Good evening, my name is Terius.” He bowed. “Satyr. Freshly in from overseas. These lovely ladies are my companions. Shira, Persa, Aminta, and Bronna. And you are?”

“Castiel, Uzziel, and Balthazar.”

“Such noble names!” He circled Castiel, sniffing at him with noisy snuffles. “Odd. You should be….”

“Unconscious? Soul switched?”

Terius cleared his throat. “Bluntly, yes. May I ask what you are, sir?”

“We’re angels.”

“Angels?” He stroked his beard. “You look so human and yet upon closer examination, I see you are not. My mistake. Are you all angels? The two ladies as well?”

“We had a Fate with us.”

His eyes widened. “Oh. Oh dear. They gave us strict orders to never bother them…. I never actually met one, you understand. I was only born a millennium ago, but I do know we were never to bother them. Is she angry with me?”

“No. I don’t believe so.” Balthazar edged towards the bustiest of the companions. “Which one are you?”

She smiled and thrust her chest towards him. “Bronna.”

“Hello, Bronna. I’m Balthazar.”

Castiel quirked a brow. Did Balthazar really want to chance upsetting Atropos by flirting with another female? Perhaps he hadn’t thought that out? “You sent a spell at us. What was it exactly and how long will it last?”

Terius crossed his arms and peered at each of them in turn before replying. “Why? It didn’t affect you.”

“It affected humans in our charge,” Uzziel told him with a frown. “We take such matters seriously.”

“Humans. You mean the others that were here? The two families? They certainly didn’t need the enlightenment. Darling couples. Adorable children.”

“Elaborate,” Castiel ordered. “Enlightenment?”

The satyr returned to his cushion, sitting on it and reaching for the graham crackers. He munched on one, then spoke. “I watched you and the dark haired woman and the other angel and the blond. You all needed to see things from the other’s perspective.” He went on and on in that vein until Castiel finally cut him off.

“Enough. How long will it last?”

“Twelve hours. I went with the short one for you. I thought a taste was all you needed.”

“Will there be adverse side effects?”

“Shouldn’t be. There’ve never been before and I’ve used this spell many times over the centuries.”

“One of the women was pregnant. Will --”

“Then her mate will have a new understanding of what she goes through. I meant no ill-will. It’s a tool for learning and, if the couple is adventurous enough…really learning about each other.” His expression turned lecherous and he waggled his brows.

Castiel strode around the clearing and stopped back where he’d started. “Balthazar, back away from the nymph, or whatever she technically is.”

“I was merely chatting, Cassie.”

“Chat on your own time. Terius, you’ll be vacating this region. Uzziel, Balthazar, and a third angel will escort you to a better area, one you may be happier in.”

He snorted. “I’m happy here.”

“Trust me. You’re not. You see,” stepping to the satyr, Castiel crouched down, “our human friends are hunters. Do you know what hunters are? If you’re as old as you say, you should understand what I’m referring to.”

“Hunters. Humans and sometimes other than humans with a knack for tracking down the different species of the supernatural community.” The satyr sobered. “Hunters are why I left the old country. Too many of them or the wannabes hanging around.”

“Once that spell is over, they’ll be wanting blood.” He deliberately exaggerated in hopes of not having to wrestle this satyr to another location. It’d be better if he went voluntarily. “You won’t be safe here. We’ll relocate you to a place you will be safe as long as you don’t make an undue amount of mischief.”

Terius stared at him. Castiel could almost hear his thoughts. Finally, he nodded. “Very well. We accept your offer. Ladies? Pack our things. We leave for greener pastures.”

“Twelve hours,” he asked.

“Yes. No more, no less. They’ll be themselves again.”

In minutes, Jael was called to join them and Jael, Balthazar, and Uzziel left with the Satyr and his companions. Castiel returned to the Winchester camp.

Atropos was sitting in a chair holding a skunk on her lap and petting it like a cat. Her expression before she noticed him was surprisingly tender. Did she like animals?

He cleared his throat. “A satyr moved in to the area. He was the one who cast the spell.”

“Impertinent creatures. Where is he now?”

“I sent Uzziel, Jael, and Balthazar to escort him and his companions to another area.”

Her eyes widened as she looked at him. “You left Balthazar with nymphs? Castiel. Are you trying to break us up?”

“I wouldn’t do that. You and Balthazar’s relationship is your own matter and doesn’t concern me unless it gets in the way of all of our duties. Uzziel will keep him in line.”

“Doubtful. I’d better follow them. Make sure those creatures understand their place. The nymphs that favor satyrs will sex up anything remotely male given the chance. Here.” She got up and held out the skunk. “She wants to be cuddled. She’s missed having affection the past year.”

“Atrpos, I’m not going to cuddle a skunk.”

She set the creature down, giving it a last pat. “She’s not a skunk. She’s cursed.”

He looked at the skunk. It went to Jo and laid down beside her, curling up and sighing. “Cursed? You mean she’s really human?” It looked like a plain skunk to him, average in size. Was she joking? He hadn’t thought Atropos had a sense of humor, however she must since she was dating Balthazar.

“She was once. A rival cursed her and she’s going to stay a skunk until her rival secures the affections of the man they both wanted. Or her rival dies.”

“Atropos….”

“Threads, remember? I’m here for her rival.”

“You’re on vacation.”

“Not exactly.” She adjusted her glasses. “I took three personal days because Balthazar didn’t want to suffer a full weekend with all of you, but as of midnight, I’m back on duty. I have a few minor things in the surrounding towns to attend to and her rival will be having an unfortunate accident due to her own negligence with the tools of her craft. At approximately eight in the morning, this animal will again be a woman, free to go home and live her life. Be kind to her, Castiel. Tell them to be kind these next hours.” She half turned away. “And if you tell anyone I have a soft spot, I will get even.”

“I won’t mention it,” he promised.

She was gone then and he waited for the Winchester family to wake up. While he could keep them asleep for the entire twelve hours, he didn’t think it would be best. They needed to know what was going on and that the children were safe.

~~~~~~~~~~

Something was wrong.

Dean knew it the second he woke without even having to open his eyes. His stomach was upset and he felt weird. He analyzed that word ‘weird’ and stretched, realizing he was on the ground and his body definitely didn’t feel right. It felt strangely smaller. He groaned, the groan a higher sound than it should be, feminine even. Though he wanted to open his eyes, he couldn’t raise the energy and instead managed to put his hands to his face and rub it.

His skin was too smooth, soft, and was that long hair? Dean slid his hands down to his chest and stopped, squeezing the breasts he found there. “I have boobs. What the freakin’ hell happened?” The voice that came from his mouth was higher than his own and sounded rather like Jo.

“Hello, Dean.” Castiel’s voice was mildly amused.

“Cas? Why do I have boobs? And for that matter, why do I sound like Jo?” He forced his eyes open, a gargantuan feat in itself and turned his head. He was startled to see his own body on the ground a short ways away. If he was here, who was in his body? Sam? Gwen? Jo? A headache pounded at his temples.

“Because you are Jo. Temporarily.” Castiel was sitting in the chair across the fire, leaning forward with hands clasped loosely together. “Don’t panic.”

“Why? What happened?” Dean pushed himself up to sit, dislodging the skunk that had been curled against him. It got up, twitched it’s tail, and moved towards the tent Dean, Jo, and Jack had been using, disappearing into it. He supposed he should think of himself in terms of ‘her’ and ‘herself’ since he was in Jo’s body for some reason Cas had yet to explain, yet he couldn’t quite make himself. “Where’s Jack? And Sean?” He pushed Jo’s hair from his face.

“Safe. Let’s wait until the others are awake. I’d rather explain only once. It should only be a few minutes.”

He watched them wake up, one at a time. Sam, apparently in Gwen’s body, was second to wake, jerking awake. Sam got up from the chair, started to back away and tripped over it, barely managing to keep to Gwen’s feet. Her body slammed hard into a tree trunk and Dean winced. “Dude. Gwen’s body. Don’t think she’ll appreciate you slamming her into a tree.”

“I’m a girl. Why am I a girl, Cas?” Gwen’s eyes fastened on Dean in Jo’s body. “Jo? What’s going on? Why… Am I in Gwen’s body? I am, aren’t I? This is her voice.”

“Not Jo, Sam. Me, Dean, and it seems we’re them and they’re us.” He swallowed hard. His stomach just wasn’t settling down.

Sam sank down to sit on the ground. “This is weird. I feel weird, like I have a hangover.” He let out a slow breath. “I really hate body switching spells. Just so you know. They suck.”

Jo was next. She yawned, sat up, and frowned, observing her own body from inside Dean’s body. He waved at her. She turned her attention to Castiel. “Hallucination?”

“No.”

“Dream?”

“No.”

“Supernaturally created problem?”

“Yes.”

She sighed. “Crapsticks.”

Before she could say anything else, Gwen woke. She stretched and said, “I was having the strangest dream….” Her eyes popped opened. She looked down at herself. “Okay. Not a dream. I have guy parts.” She looked up. “Sam’s guy parts. Who here knows what’s going on?”

“We’re awake, Cas. Tell us all about it.” Dean got up from the ground and moaned as his stomach rebelled, hands resting there. “I think I’m gonna ralph.”

“Don’t stand up so fast,” Jo told him. “Just sit down and eat a couple saltines. You don’t want to move fast standing up from a chair, the ground, or getting out of bed. Baby doesn’t like it.”

“Mmm. A cracker ain’t gonna fix this. This is nausea on the projectile vomiting pea soup level. I think the camp is even spinning a little….” He took a deep breath and slowly let it out. The flip-flopping in his stomach suddenly ceased. “Wait. Never mind. I think it’s over.”

“That’s what you think.” Jo got up from the ground, staggered a few seconds, and made her way to the food tubs. After a minute, she staggered back. Castiel stood and steadied her. “Here. Crackers.” She practically tossed the box at Dean and dropped into the nearest chair. “I’m so not used to seeing things from your height.”

Dean took the remaining chair, opened the crackers and took one out. “Go on, Cas.”

“Tell us you can fix this,” Sam said.

“Our kids?” Gwen asked. “Where are they?”

“Did Abby take them?” Jo looked worried. Dean recognized the expression on his own face.

With a long sigh, Castiel began to speak.

~~~~~~~~~~

Their reactions weren’t as bad as they would have been even a year earlier. Cas supposed they were all growing more jaded as time went on, taking strange events in stride. He glanced at each of them. “The children are fine. Jack and Sean are with Ellen and Bobby and the baby is healthy. The switch didn’t hurt your…” He stopped himself at the last second from giving away the sex. “The baby is well. As for your current places, it’s reversible.”

“How did it happen?” Gwen seemed uncomfortable in Sam’s body, shifting in the chair and moving constantly.

He tried to laugh. “Well, it’s sort of funny….” When no one seemed amused, he cleared his throat. “You’ll be back to normal in a few hours. Perhaps eight. The spell lasts for twelve and four have passed.”

“Who did we piss off,” Jo asked.

“What did we piss off,” Dean corrected. He seemed distracted by the fact that he had cleavage, adjusting Jo’s shirt every few seconds.

“Why do we always assume it’s us that pissed some one or thing off?” Gwen crossed Sam’s arms.

“Because that’s usually the case,” Sam replied from Gwen’s body, still over by the tree.

Castiel had to agree with Sam on that one. “It was an accident. The spell was actually meant for Balthazar and Atropos.” Castiel paused, then added, “And me and Abigael.”

Jo pursed Dean’s lips while Dean rolled her eyes and replied, “I guess the question really should be: who did you guys piss off?” He reached for the crackers.

“The local satyr.”

“The….” Gwen’s brows rose in an amused expression that was pure Sam. “Local satyr? Seriously?”

“There’s a local one,” Dean replied around a mouthful of crackers.

“We didn’t piss him off exactly.” Castiel found it amusing that, despite the four being in different bodies, he could easily tell who was who by how they spoke and moved. “He recently migrated to this area and due to Atropos and Balthazar’s somewhat tempestuous relationship and what he said was ‘unresolved sexual tension’ between myself and Abigael, he thought we’d be…enlightened were our souls to switch bodies for a few hours.”

“Didn’t he know three of you were angels and one a Fate?” Jo crossed Dean’s arms.

“He didn’t realize his spells don’t work on angels or Fates because he’d never met any. The spell bounced off of us and headed for the nearest two human couples.”

“Which would be us.” Gwen snorted. “Wonderful. Where’s the satyr now?”

He put his hands in his coat pockets. “Uzziel, Balthazar, and Jael are escorting him and his companions to a safer region.”

“Wonderful.” Sam leaned forward. “So, eight more hours of this.”

“You’ll be yourselves again later tonight.” He studied them. “Now that you’re awake, I really should check in with Abigael, then with Uzziel on the relocation effort. I’ll return shortly. I suggest you rest.”

“Rest?” Gwen pushed Sam’s body to stand and immediately thrust his arms out like she was afraid she’d fall over. “How are we supposed to rest? We’re not ourselves. I don’t know about everyone else, but…body switching? It’s --”

“Reversible and Castiel said it’ll only be a few more hours.” Sam got to Gwen’s feet and approached. “We’ll be okay, Gwen. It’s weird, but I got through it once before, we can all get through eight hours.”

“Once before?”

While Sam explained, Castiel slipped away.