The Long Road Back

Chapter Twelve: Home Again

~~~~~~~~~~

"Dear Ani,

I'm dreadfully sorry I could not meet you for dinner. I would have informed you earlier of the change of plans, but it was rather sudden. I had not seen it coming at all. It was one of those sudden surprises that life sends out from time to time. Are you amenable to setting another time and place? I'm afraid I won't be able to get away for --"

Padmé paused in her writing. How long could she conceivably get away with? One month? Two? Their eventual meeting was now inevitable. It was only a matter of time before they came face to face and had to confront the past and the future. If his letters reflected who he'd become, then they would be able to work towards a future together, but if he was lying....

She didn't want to consider that idea. If he was lying, then there was no future for them and her belief he could be redeemed from his actions was a false one. Padmé erased the last line of the letter and went on to discuss her cleaning up of the cottage. She described the removal of the ivy and of her packing up of those projects she didn't think she'd finish. What she didn't tell him was that she'd donated the supplies to the craft club. Everything had gone to them, leaving her with only novels and puzzles left to fill her time.

Well, that and the most recent project that had somehow dropped into her lap. A secret project it would be best if no one knew about.

For a dead woman, Padmé decided she was quite active. Veiled and robed to hide her identity, she'd been helping set up a doctor network in this section of the galaxy. When letters to various editors and to senators had yielded nothing, she had, of course, taken matters into her own hands and begun feeling out individuals about the rebellion still in fledgling phase. They needed someone who had organizational skills. Padmé had those in abundance and so she was organizing the rebel medical network, quietly recruiting doctors who'd taken early retirement from the Imperial Medical Association.

It was still a small network, but she thought it was a good one. Besides, if she could thwart Palpatine she would. He had brought more pain to her than anyone, for he had been instrumental in Anakin's turning. She knew that.

Padmé sent off the letter and looked about the cottage. It was time to face it, wasn't it? She couldn't live in isolation. She hated it. All of those diversions had done nothing for her. She hated being hidden away, separated from everyone and everything. There was a reason she'd begun to clean out the cottage and her current belongings, if only she could admit it to herself.

I can't stay here, she thought. So where am I going to go? Back to Tatooine? Back to sand, rocks and two suns that bake a person until the slightest cooling of the air brings just enough relief to feel even warmer when the heat again rises? Yes. Back to Obi-Wan and Dormé. Back to friends who would gladly share their exile with her. She'd have to live with Dormé's pregnancy, now nearing the end, and the baby when it came.

She was strong enough to do it. She'd go back and live with them, despite memories and longings. Why?

Because she was Padmé Naberrie Amidala Skywalker. She was strong.

Padmé began to pack.

~~~~~~~~~~

Anakin embraced the little side therapies designed to relieve the symptoms of his condition even if he did find some of them a little odd. Like this one.

He stood just inside the door to the shop in one of the many garment districts of Coruscant, staring at the rows and rows of fabric with a sensation of having stepped into a bizarre world he'd never understand. The place was huge. How did anyone find anything?

"May I help you, sir?"

Turning his head, he saw a blue haired woman as tall as he was. "I sure hope so. I have an appointment with Lanis for a wardrobe consultation." His tongue stumbled upon the words. He'd never had to think about clothes before. As a slave, his choices had been beige and white. As a Jedi, his choices had grown to include browns as well and as a Sith, he wore primarily black. He'd discovered there were hundreds of tiny variations in black.

Vader claimed black was a classic, but Anakin thought Vader liked the color mainly because blood didn't show on it.

Doc had suggested he get his colors done, insisting that wearing a nice shade of orange or yellow could make anyone's mood perk up. The idea of orange made him cringe. He remembered a particularly ugly ballgown he'd once been forced to don that had been orange.... Lanis at Color Code Wave -- CC Wave for short -- was supposed to be the best at both color and wardrobe consultations.

"Are you Anakin, then?"

"Yes," he replied.

"Oh welcome!" Her smile widened. "He's waiting for you in his studio."

Anakin followed the willowy woman through the rows of fabric and into a room a mere fraction of the size of the previous one. For the rest of the day and into part of the night, Lanis introduced him to color and style.

There were pinks, blues, oranges, yellows and greens. No reds though. He hated red and for good reason. Palpatine loved the color. Spring green was Anakin's new personal favorite, that and a dark purple-navy. The green reminded him of new beginnings and was very uplifting. As for the purple-navy....He wasn't sure why he liked it exactly, but he did. Then came the patterns and the clothing designs. Lanis recommended tunics and vests and capes and Anakin was amazed at just how many styles of tunic there were. Why, he could wear a different style everyday and not repeat a single one for nearly a year!

He left carrying ready-made tunics in the spring green and purple navy and a few articles to go with each. He was pleased with the day and with the wardrobe he'd have soon. He couldn't wait to wear it all!

~~~~~~~~~~

Anakin was a lost cause. Palpatine was disgusted by that turn of events. Years of his time and effort were wasted. That boy had Vader wedged so firmly down inside him that Palpatine wasn't sure now just what could be done to cause Vader to re-emerge. Too bad Anakin's running about the galaxy hadn't produced another wife or baby. That would have been good, though he suspected Anakin wouldn't be as shattered a second time. Why? Because his attachment to Padmé Amidala had been carefully nurtured and prodded by Palpatine whenever possible.

No matter what Anakin and Padmé had thought later, a ten-year old should not have an obsession with an older girl that lasts more than a few weeks at most. It wasn't normal for a boy to dream of that girl for ten years and not turn his affections to others. Anakin had never been quite normal though and Palpatine had done everything possible to keep Padmé Amidala on Anakin's periphery.

Unfortunately, the boy no longer trusted him with such matters. Palpatine did know he'd been writing to some woman somewhere, but nothing had apparently come of their romance so far, if it was indeed a romance. He'd made a recent trip to Naboo, probably to meet her, but had stayed only a few hours. Unless this woman was of the easy variety -- and he didn't think she was -- Palpatine doubted anything had occurred.

Anakin had quit using Vader's expense account for things such as flowers and travel expenses, so Palpatine had to snoop in Vader's personal accounts now for information. There were strange things lurking in the lines of that account summary and things he didn't care to see.

Clinic expenses that included such words as 'synthskin' and 'limb shaping'. Pharmacy bills with prescriptions for anxiety medication and a male enhancement drug, and oxygen tanks. And most recently, a bill from some place called 'CC Wave'. He could only guess what that was. Probably some sort of brothel. The bill was certainly high enough for one of upper end places.

He tapped his fingers and yearned for the good old days, back when Vader had been in charge of the body and had not hesitated to strike fear into the hearts of any dissenting voices. These days, he was lucky if Anakin said 'boo'.

Kenobi had to be found, that was all there was to it. Palpatine needed a new apprentice and fast. So why did he keep Anakin around in the meantime, he wondered to himself. Partially because he still needed him to do the paperwork and grunt work and partially because the farcical scenes of Anakin's existence recently were amusing him in a 'fascinated by gore' sort of way. Watching Anakin run around had become entertainment to him, like those weekly trips to the theater. He had a morbid curiosity as to what Anakin would do next.

Oh well. Find Kenobi, groom him a bit and let the two have it out once more. Bye-bye Anakin. Hello new apprentice.

Getting up from his chair, he left the room. Time for another trip to see the Death Star construction. Briefly he wondered if Tarkin had been able to make any headway in the mouse droid problem. Irritating things. Who had the nerve to keep setting them free on Imperial ships?

~~~~~~~~~~

Timtec Taytec liked his new career. He could work alone and take only the jobs he wanted. Pest extermination was not exactly hard, but this? He held out the mouse droid. "You see, I can't complete the job because these aren't living creatures."

Moff Tarkin's lips tightened. "They certainly manage to multiply like it."

"But they aren't, so I can't finish the job."

"Your field, Mr. Taytec, is pest control. Those," he pointed a bony finger at the droid, "are pests. Surely you can finish that line of reasoning by yourself."

"Of course sir, but my field is extermination. There's a difference between control and extermination."

"Is there? I was under the impression that both were your field."

"No sir."

Tarkin's eyes narrowed. "Well then. Perhaps you should explain to the Emperor why you took this job when you have no intention of finishing it."

Panic tightened his throat. "The...the...Emperor?" Suddenly, Timtec felt itchy all over and more than a little claustrophobic.

"Yes. He'll be arriving soon. Have a report ready for him on the actual nature of your services. I doubt that he will be pleased with your deception."

"Um...no, sir...I meant to say," he gulped, wiping at his profusely sweating brow with one hand, "I'll get started immediately on that mouse droid problem. You can count on me."

Tarkin's lips thinned further, nearly disappearing altogether, but he turned without another comment and stalked away. Timtec let out a deep breath and set the droid down. No way was he sticking around here. It was time to find a nice planet in the Outer Rim to retire on.

No one was going to make him give a report to anyone. Especially to Emperor Palpatine.

Not quite understanding why, he left his equipment, informed a trooper he was done and that the mouse droids would begin dying out soon, and left on his small ship. He sold everything he had, changed his name and lived for long years as a hermit. No one bothered him and he never had another blackout.

He did, however, frequently suffer from nightmares where he flew about a room in a cloud composed entirely of stinging light creatures.

~~~~~~~~~~

Obi-Wan and Dormé welcomed Padmé back to them with open arms. The room she'd used was now ready for the baby, but Padmé didn't care. She'd sleep in the living area if need be. She told them about her last project, which brought a fierce frown to Obi-Wan's face.

"Can't stay away from it, can you, Padmé? What is so difficult about being anonymous and out of intrigue? Do you have to enmesh yourself at every opportunity?"

"I had to do something," she argued, watching Dormé out of the corner of her eye. Her friend was hugely pregnant now and Padmé wondered if maybe they'd gotten her due date wrong and she in fact over-due. "I couldn't sit back--"

"Why not? Why not let the galaxy go to blazes? We have the children for the future. Keep yourself safe and let them grow--"

"I've been talking to Ani, Obi-Wan."

He sat back as though he'd been punched, a sickly expression upon his face. "You've what?"

Padmé leaned forward. "Don't worry, it was anonymous. We've been conversing since shortly after I left here."

He wouldn't listen, reiterating how stupid he thought she'd been to leave in the first place and sliding them both back into the old arguments they'd had on the subject. When he stalked out of the house, Dormé looked up from her sewing.

"He's a little tense lately."

"I shouldn't have come back here. I've made it harder for you both, haven't I?"

"Maybe. Maybe not." She slipped a hand behind her. "Oh, I wish my back would quit hurting."

The comment distracted her. "Hurting how? You're not going into labor are you?"

Dormé frowned. "No, I've still got a couple weeks. Can't wait until it's over. I'm sick of being pregnant."

Padmé was grateful for the change of subject.

~~~~~~~~~~

Obi-Wan moved to the speeder that had brought Padmé here and leaned against it.

How could Padmé be so stupid as to get involved with the rebellion? He'd thought her more intelligent than that. She was supposed to be hiding, keeping a quiet life. What had made her think getting involved would be good on any level? And then to come here?

Now he'd be worrying even more that the empire was going to come here. What was going on in her mind? Had she gone insane? Possibly if her claim of contacting Anakin...no, Vader... was true. There were times when he didn't understand her at all. Did she have a death wish now?

Glancing up, he caught a glimpse of metal flashing in the distance, but it was quickly gone and he returned to his ponderings.

~~~~~~~~~~

It wasn't often that Palpatine had recurring dreams in his half-sleep state, but this one was most enjoyable. He watched Kenobi and Anakin fight, ignoring Anakin's strange clothes. Back and forth, moving closer. Palpatine smiled, caught up in the delightful scenes. He wasn't idle either, busy plying some deserving soul with Sith lightning. It was quite a satisfying show of power and he thought it was about time this person realized the extent of his power and got what was due.

Who was it?

Did it matter? It was a dream after all.

He saw Kenobi leap backward, tossing his lightsaber into the air and then --

Roused fully to the sound of a voice. One of his bodyguards. Irritated, he sat up. "What is it?"

"A message for you, my lord."

Moments later, his irritation was replaced by anticipation.

Kenobi had been found.